On these types of days, I must take time out for gratitude. I am thankful for my license. I can drive to the coffee shop and get a coffee. I get to listen to the kids working and laughing about some dumb kid things, lol. I have clean water and clothes. I am not locked up or being tortured. I can read, write, see, walk, talk, touch, feel, taste, and experience life today.

I know the sun is shining so bright behind the clouds. Thank you, sun ☀️

Now, onward….

I like cake.

I like to have my cake and eat it too.

Why would I want cake if I can’t eat it?

What an eye-rolling thing to say to someone.

{Think snarky, jealous, aggressive tone} —

“You just want to have your cake and eat it too, don’t you?”

{Response: James Bond mode — smooth, confident, unbothered}

“Why yes… yes I do. I’ll be eating your cake too.”

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Now that you’re dreaming about frosting, we’re switching gears.

Can you be highly successful… and not be trying very hard?

This is the difference between forcing things to happen and being in alignment — or flowing with the work to be done.

The cake = minimum level of stress

Eating the cake = being highly successful

(insert cake-eating pic)

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Our society celebrates stress, self-sacrifice, endless busyness, tiredness, and burnout as badges of honor — like you have to be maxed out to be “successful” or worthy.

But I’m finding a new way.

Force or hustle culture is a dopamine-fed system — quick wins equal dopamine hits. Serotonin is longer-term satisfaction; it comes from calm, focused progress and feels more satisfying and longer lasting.

I used to work myself to death. Everything MATTERED. Everything was URGENT. My whole life — and my family’s — seemed to DEPEND on me being “successful.” This gear is survival mode.

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At that time, success for me meant paying all the bills, taking care of responsibilities, buying whatever we wanted, going on vacations, eating out, and having nice things. This was 80%. The other 20% was being super Dad/Husband.

Now I see that as maybe 40% success — and 40% is an F on any test.

A big piece of the success cake is:

1. mental health
2. body health
3. relationship health
4. spiritual health

Those four alone make up at least 50% of the deliciousness.

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And yes, I can do maths — that leaves another 10%.

That part varies per person.

Success looks different for everyone.

What does it look like for you?

Maybe your 10% is a solid family life.

Maybe it’s the most badass toy collection.

Maybe it’s birdwatching, deep meditation, climbing a mountain, or holding public office.

I remember sitting outside a big corporate office when I was 25, watching people walk in — dressed sharp, professional — and thinking, That would be the dream job.

Well, I got that gig.

And within a year, that dream had turned into a trap — a nightmare.

I remember thinking, This is my life?

I share that to say this:

Pay attention to the dream you’re chasing and the life you desire.

Is it truly your dream?

And more importantly — why?

That “dream job” was a grass-is-greener version of success — what I thought I was supposed to be doing, not what my soul actually wanted.

We all have internal indicators — like the lights on your car’s dashboard.

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The quiet voice.

The emotions.

The sensations in your heart or gut.

They’ll tell you if you’re heading in the right direction… if you’re willing to tune in.

This is a reminder that you can be, do, and have whatever you want in life. Set your sights on it. Dial it in. Don’t take it too seriously — no stress — just start walking toward it, in alignment, flowing with life.

Much love,
Casey